Out of pure frustration and a seething sense of betrayal. I am gonna say a few words about hurting a woman's feelings. I'm gonna speak from my own experience.
My mom always told me to choose my battles... meaning that i can't throw all my emotional effort into every little injustice. i carry those words with me so sometimes when someone i care about hurts my feelings, especially if its unintentional, i do my best to let it slide and get over it. Theres no need to make both of us feel bad over something that was just a thoughtless mistake.
But i'm a woman who finds it hard to hide her feelings.... really hard. so even when i am trying to not make a big deal over something, something i dont want to 'battle' with, most of the time the other person (usually a guy) can still tell i'm upset.
so the first thing he does is ask if i'm upset. The last thing i'll ever be called is a liar, so i answer. the inevitable second question goes like 'is it something i did?' at which point i answer honestly and simply explain that i dont like to pick over small things and if you dont mind dropping the subject we can squash it, NSA.
to which the reply is, inevitably, something like 'no, i'd rather know'. after which i generally offer a clear and concise explination of what happened, why it hurt my feelings, why i know its either not your fault or not a big deal, and why we really dont need to talk about it any further.
to which the reply is, inevitably, a pile of explanations as to why things went down the way they did, what was going through his mind, where he was coming from at that point in time, why it isn't really his fault (usually a different reason than i gave).
so whats missing? besides the entirely predictable nature of these exchanges, it sounds like a perfectly rational conversation between two relatively mature human beings.
the thing that gets me every single last time is that, after all that, after i asked to drop it, after you pressured me into talking to you about it, and after i have to listen to your list of reasons and excuses and rationalities. After all that and usually after aknowledging that you can understand how i feel..
inevitably
not a single guy has said hes sorry. and i won't get into why i think that is right now. i will just say that it happens every time and if you're a guy reading this and going 'wow, i've been there,' next time, even if you dont really get where im coming from, offer your girl an apology. sometimes it makes things all better.
